A revelation recently came upon me concerning the seemingly endless process of being wounded, being brought into the wound, and being restored. What I mean by "endless process" is that if you think about it, people will never stop being harsh, unforgiving, merciless creatures. Or put it this way; you have a whole lifetime ahead of you and if Christ has been recently restoring you from some pain, it may have crossed your mind that whatever hurt you so bad that you needed the power of the Holy Spirit to recover from it, may happen again. You may have discovered that wounds from your childhood that have changed your life for the worse are only constrained to that time, and more wounding had happened after that and there is probably more wounding to follow.
So how can we ever live abundant life? How can we ever be restored if we'll just get slapped back down into wounding again? Is there ever a time that the past can be just that, and have no bearing on your future?
There are a couple of directions that I'd like to come at this with but I'll start by answering this question with a preliminary question: Which do you feel is more powerful, the wound or Jesus?
Now I know you know the answer to that question, but how do you feel in response to that question? Do you feel like every prayer you've ever offered to the Lord about forgiving someone who betrayed you or overcoming a fear of a certain type of person has fallen back on the floor, unanswered. Perhaps you nobly referred back to the book of Job and said, "Look at what God allowed Job to go through." acknowledging the providential purposes of God and touching off your deepest doubts with well-meaning but useless spiritual ascents.
You see, Jesus has more power than your wound, and in reality He healed your wound on the cross, long before the wound even occurred. That statement isn't meant just to lay in the crypts of theology though, it is a challenge to your faith and whether you believe it or not.
That's just one way I'd like to talk about this. It is a good introduction, however, because you
CAN NOT move further in this blog or even think about healing in general without the bare requirement of faith in God's ability, and willingness to do it.
As for how God heals your wound that is another matter entirely which I don't have the time to work on right now. But suppose you've been healed or restored. And you just came out of a time in your life that was dominated by a proclivity to choose sin over God because you felt you didn't have any choice. And now the pain of unforgiveness, personal wounding, assault on your character (whatever it may be) is at your door again. What do we do?
First, I'd like to build establish this idea from a foundation of truth. You are a King AND a Priest in God's Kingdom. (Rev. 5:10) You are redeemed from sin (Eph. 1:7) and you have power!!! (Acts 1:8) The last one I'd like to emphasize the most. The power of God is at work IN you!! (Phil. 2:13) All these things considered, and hopefully existing as a full blown reality in your life, you are now able to engage a potentially wounding situation and turn it into a moment when God's power can be realized, established and His Kingdom restored to the Earth. You, and Me... we have this great responsibility, this terrifying opportunity to be an ambassador and warrior of the Kingdom of God. Problems inevitably are coming our way. I don't care who you are at this moment, in the days to come, you will have hardship. That is undeniable, inescapable... whatever... it must happen! And when it does... how will you react? Will you retreat into the wound you're trying to heal? Will you activate the power of the flesh (by trusting in it's methods and results)? Or will you stand against it and hand Satan his attempt to wound you right back to him, saying, "No thank you, I'm clean because of the word Jesus has spoken to me." (John 15:3) and give him a little smile.
You see, we're called to overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:21) I know in the context, Paul is talking about our actions, but I'd like to point out that this ideology applies on the broadest spectrum possible. Consider the cross! God, overcame evil, the pure evil of sin with His good. Take that idea to whatever level you'd like to, it works on every one! But here is my point, you are not called to take a beating for the devil and smile, YOU ARE CALLED TO MAKE SATAN FALL LIKE LIGHTNING FROM HEAVEN!
Let me ask you this, what is your role in the kingdom? Are you a whipping boy for other people, Satan, God and most of all yourself? I only know how that goes because I've lived it but I'd like to say please show me this in scripture. Show me, just once where it says that the purpose of our lives as followers of Christ, necessitates our crushed broken attitudes and downcast faces instead of living as people of destiny.
Two examples: Recently, someone in authority over me was demeaning my character. They were talking to me like I was stupid and coincidentally I struggle with the lie that I'm a stupid, incapable, immature kid. Honestly, when people go there, my gut reaction is simply to withdraw.
"Nope. This is getting too serious and I can't let this wound go any deeper. They're touching on a place that I just can't deal with, I'm afraid of what might happen or how I might react."
etc.
The plot twist was when I chose not to be afraid anymore. After that, I chose not to agree with what they were saying and do what my fears were telling me. Not only that, I disagreed with who they were saying and believing they were and I assigned the power of God and the dignity back to them which Satan was trying to steal from them right there. Do you know how badly the devil lost at that moment?
Not only did he not wound me, but he failed to activate and empower the wounding of someone else.
The other example could simply be said that someone was tyrannically ranting at me and instead of cowering and closing up while they were doing (my fear being that I didn't want them to get any angrier, and I myself didn't want to get angry and have my sin take over like theirs was) I then denied every false claim they were making, calmly, respectfully, and offered to pray right there.
These examples aren't here so you can know how great I am, I'm trying to communicate a moment of remarkable success in my life for your benefit, that isn't by my power, but the power of God. If you've read all I've said, it's plainly in the Bible anyway. On top of that, I don't want to be an open throbbing wound my whole life, that's not what God died for and that's not how the kingdom of God works. If Satan is being aggressive, YOU CAN BE AGGRESSIVE. I mean to say that you can be aggressively loving, humble and you can proactively defend the truth of God not just in the political arena, or in the philosophical arena, but in your personal arena when things start getting crazy and Satan tries to rule stuff that's not his.
"the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and violent men take it by force." (Matt. 11:12) Do you now see what this means? Jesus isn't priming the disciples to take on the Roman army. If that was his intention then what a fail! No, this means that evil will take over, gladly, if you sit back and agree with it until you live a life of defeat and consistent dismay. And the Kingdom of Heaven needs warriors of love, not people who look at sin and say, "Well, there goes the neighborhood!" No!!! It's your responsibility!!!! Don't let Satan take burn you out, insult you, tear down your character and convince you that there's nothing you can do about it. Fight back.... the way Jesus intended: With loving, foot washing, joy, courageous hope in others, unrelenting faith in the Father and his plan, and by atmosphere transforming, evil shattering self sacrifice, to the point of death.
(Note: There's a caution I carried, throughout the writing of this entry to avoid the danger of triumphalism, meaning, I didn't want to paint an unrealistic picture of the life Jesus intended. People (preachers especially) tend to paint a redeemed life as being untouchable and free from any pain. That's not what I hope to communicate, pain is in the process, but many times pain can be transformed into goodness in that crucial moment, often referred to as the "Kairos" moment, which is a moment that doesn't rely on actual time, but is a time, if that makes sense. Triumphalism in its practice also tends to have disinterest or disregard for other viewpoints, concerns and commonly carries the freight of an agenda. It's not observant or cautious, and if this blog is properly understood, it can lead to the most observant and most cautious ways to deal with the pains and woundings of life, not only by coming out unscathed, but with more people better off than they would have been before, while evil intentions were behind it the whole time. The ultimate redemption: an evil will leading to an evil action hoping for destruction, but being intercepted, received with love, engaged, not run from and producing a Godly fruit. Evil, producing Godly fruit. That's right. It can happen. Hallelujah.)
Friday, November 18, 2011
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
An Array Of Good Movies
I was recently formulating an inventory of movies that relay the concept of life-transforming discipleship. The pouring in of a guide to the younger, unseasoned disciple. The common thread in many of these movies is the helplessness of the learner and the total control of the teacher. The confusion of the disciple in trying to tie down the methods of his teacher and his eventual development as his unforeseen potential reveals itself through affliction.
There are so many truths packed into each one of these movies. I'll do my best to summarize each one, but the experience that film can portray is sometimes unparalleled.
Here's the rub:
The Karate Kid 3
Good Will Hunting
Scent of a Woman
The Last Samurai
The King's Speech
The Empire Strikes Back
I'm sure the list goes on.... I'll add more as I remember, but some of these movies are so key. In the Karate Kid 3, Daniel-san is in the midst of spiritual warfare. Mr. Miagi has one interest; teaching Daniel virtue, integrity and inner resolution. The enemy, Terry Silver, has one goal... To destroy Daniel in hopes of injuring Mr. Miagi.
This movie happens to be my favorite. This movie demonstrates spiritual warfare to it's core.
The truth is Satan can't touch God. God is God and of course Satan's creator. There's nothing that Satan can do in the realm of harm to the God of the universe. Satan knows, better than we do, that he is a created being under a Holy and powerful God. So what does he do with all this hatred? He lashes out at the prodigy... the image bearer. God's workmanship. I could go on and on about the parallels in this movie, but you have to just watch it. On top of being a dead-ringer to the story of God, it's an amazing close to the Karate Kid saga. Unfortunately, The Next Karate Kid starring Hillary Swank was the first in many unfortunate reboots, and should be discarded from all our memories entirely.
Then there's Good Will Hunting. This movie is gospel for a seemingly infinite amount of reasons. The main character is a disturbed, trouble maker from south Boston named Will Hunting. The movie's name is GOOD Will Hunting for heaven's sake!!! How can we miss this gospel? This kid can't go two days without getting into a fight on the streets, and eventually it gets the best of him when he hits a cop and goes to jail. One out of many counselors and therapists sees the potential, not in his ability, but in his character. Sean Maguire, a fellow Bostonian sees the wounded, scared and disillusioned delinquent and knows that Will Hunting is capable of being more than a performer.
Scent of a Woman marks the story of Charlie, a softy, college kid that lands the job of babysitting an army corporal. Little does he know, he's about to receive the ultimate experience in manhood. This movie perfectly captures the experience of graduating from childhood into adulthood. The whole movie, Charlie receives these unforgettable lessons about how most people in the world are pathetically fake. From Frank Slade's arrogant family, to the boyfriend of the random girl in the restaurant, the formational concept in this movie is not about proving who's right or who's wrong, but more in line with being wrong, with integrity. This is an important lesson for the Kingdom of God. We need to realize that without Christ, we are all wrong, and even after we receive Christ, we can be wrong, and our flesh still is wrong, and we need to be sources of grace to ourselves and the world around us when it all comes crashing down.
Frank Slade's speech at the end of the movie is an incredible representation of Jesus fighting for us in the courtroom of our accusers. So many times, the Devil pins us down under accusations with concepts that if carefully thought out, hold no weight yet sound fierce, and pan out to be more emotion and intimidation than legitimate truth.
The Last Samurai explores the heart of the wounded warrior. (Do I sound enough like John Eldredge or do I need to wax more extravagant). Nathan Algrin has an alcohol problem, and is extracted out of his element by a much more seasoned and centered warrior... from the enemy's forces no less! Instead of his enemy in battle destroying him, his enemy teaches him, restores him, and nurtures the poet balance that is present within every warrior. This is so true of Jesus! While in the midst of horror, Jesus teaches us about beauty. In the presence of pain, He shows us the reality of God's love. Jesus grants us power under the banner of great restraint.
King George the 6th cannot make a speech to save his life in a world that is not communicating by radio. His success depends on the ability that is his greatest weakness. In The King's Speech, Colin Firth plays a King in the making that refuses to accept his mantle of royalty and that trusts more in his weakness than in his potential to grow. "Berty" also has the heart of a servant and a devotion to what is right over a devotion to self-service, made evident in his brother. The counselor to counseled relationship is awesome. Unmistakable, at certain parts, for the way Christ deals with our uncertainty, our rejection of His encouragement and our fatalist assumption of all things being lost, the King's counselor Lionel Lougue demands that he relate in unassuming, friendly terms that force royalty to humble themselves. The wonderful paradox of this movie is that Lionel's counsel to the King emphasizes humility and equal standing with all men, while reassuring King George's total qualification to rule a country, even a country at the brink of war.
So much like Jesus. To bring us down to bring us up. Jesus says in Mark 10:42-45
“You know that those who are recognized as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them; and their great men exercise authority over them. 43 But it is not this way among you, but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant; 44 and whoever wishes to be first among you shall be slave of all. 45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”
Perfectly capturing the ethic of Jesus, I say.
The Empire Strikes Back has one thing that keeps me comin back for more every time.
The revelation of Yoda as one of the most powerful Jedi's of all time.
He's green, he's short. He clearly has no lightsaber... he may not even have any known enemies. But by spending a little time with him, you know that he can take down armies. How?
With wisdom. With practiced strength that flows from a direct, unfiltered connection to his source of power. Luke is in an unmistakable phase of questing, fascination and discovery of his own powers. Little does he realize that these things, if unchecked, can turn into an obsession and rule his future as a Jedi, eventually turning him to the dark side with the promise of more power. Yoda's central theme is that his looks and approach break every perception that Luke has for what a Jedi should be and move Luke into a oneness a solidarity that align morals and action in a way that has him speaking life into his own father, DARTH VADER, in the next movie. Luke tells his own father, the resident master of the force in the galaxy, "Search your feelings father, there is good in you, I know it." And Luke's commitment to the truth about the dark side, the Jedi way, and refusing the power granted by moral sacrifice gives us a glimpse of the finished man that can come about when allowing Jesus to break our perceptions and show us a way that is so unpopular, it's actually totally unheard of.
There are more, much more lessons to be learned from these movies and other movies. Dutch is another good one. Blind Fury with Rutger Hauer, a great one. A blind vet takes on his best friend's kid to show him that the world isn't safe and that selfishness is the safest form of living there is, resulting in self-defeat. It goes on and on and on.
Then there's our story. Someone, much much greater than us has swooped in as if from nowhere. His words have challenged and tried us to the point of total confusion. His Spirit has kept us in the game by way of total attraction to His person. At the moment of our utter desperation and imminent failure, he has entered the situation uninvited and saved us, rendering the enemy powerless. We are Daniel-San, we are Charlie, we are Luke... only it's Jesus that comes and opens our eyes. We need rescue.
That's all for now. Check out this clip from Scent of a Woman.... we live in an unfair world, but we have a lawyer that argues our case.... PERFECTLY. In addition to that, He validates us as people, fully restores us, and contends for the person that is hidden beneath the fallen man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dH4p9BQ3V9o
There are so many truths packed into each one of these movies. I'll do my best to summarize each one, but the experience that film can portray is sometimes unparalleled.
Here's the rub:
The Karate Kid 3
Good Will Hunting
Scent of a Woman
The Last Samurai
The King's Speech
The Empire Strikes Back
I'm sure the list goes on.... I'll add more as I remember, but some of these movies are so key. In the Karate Kid 3, Daniel-san is in the midst of spiritual warfare. Mr. Miagi has one interest; teaching Daniel virtue, integrity and inner resolution. The enemy, Terry Silver, has one goal... To destroy Daniel in hopes of injuring Mr. Miagi.
This movie happens to be my favorite. This movie demonstrates spiritual warfare to it's core.
The truth is Satan can't touch God. God is God and of course Satan's creator. There's nothing that Satan can do in the realm of harm to the God of the universe. Satan knows, better than we do, that he is a created being under a Holy and powerful God. So what does he do with all this hatred? He lashes out at the prodigy... the image bearer. God's workmanship. I could go on and on about the parallels in this movie, but you have to just watch it. On top of being a dead-ringer to the story of God, it's an amazing close to the Karate Kid saga. Unfortunately, The Next Karate Kid starring Hillary Swank was the first in many unfortunate reboots, and should be discarded from all our memories entirely.
Then there's Good Will Hunting. This movie is gospel for a seemingly infinite amount of reasons. The main character is a disturbed, trouble maker from south Boston named Will Hunting. The movie's name is GOOD Will Hunting for heaven's sake!!! How can we miss this gospel? This kid can't go two days without getting into a fight on the streets, and eventually it gets the best of him when he hits a cop and goes to jail. One out of many counselors and therapists sees the potential, not in his ability, but in his character. Sean Maguire, a fellow Bostonian sees the wounded, scared and disillusioned delinquent and knows that Will Hunting is capable of being more than a performer.
Scent of a Woman marks the story of Charlie, a softy, college kid that lands the job of babysitting an army corporal. Little does he know, he's about to receive the ultimate experience in manhood. This movie perfectly captures the experience of graduating from childhood into adulthood. The whole movie, Charlie receives these unforgettable lessons about how most people in the world are pathetically fake. From Frank Slade's arrogant family, to the boyfriend of the random girl in the restaurant, the formational concept in this movie is not about proving who's right or who's wrong, but more in line with being wrong, with integrity. This is an important lesson for the Kingdom of God. We need to realize that without Christ, we are all wrong, and even after we receive Christ, we can be wrong, and our flesh still is wrong, and we need to be sources of grace to ourselves and the world around us when it all comes crashing down.
Frank Slade's speech at the end of the movie is an incredible representation of Jesus fighting for us in the courtroom of our accusers. So many times, the Devil pins us down under accusations with concepts that if carefully thought out, hold no weight yet sound fierce, and pan out to be more emotion and intimidation than legitimate truth.
The Last Samurai explores the heart of the wounded warrior. (Do I sound enough like John Eldredge or do I need to wax more extravagant). Nathan Algrin has an alcohol problem, and is extracted out of his element by a much more seasoned and centered warrior... from the enemy's forces no less! Instead of his enemy in battle destroying him, his enemy teaches him, restores him, and nurtures the poet balance that is present within every warrior. This is so true of Jesus! While in the midst of horror, Jesus teaches us about beauty. In the presence of pain, He shows us the reality of God's love. Jesus grants us power under the banner of great restraint.
King George the 6th cannot make a speech to save his life in a world that is not communicating by radio. His success depends on the ability that is his greatest weakness. In The King's Speech, Colin Firth plays a King in the making that refuses to accept his mantle of royalty and that trusts more in his weakness than in his potential to grow. "Berty" also has the heart of a servant and a devotion to what is right over a devotion to self-service, made evident in his brother. The counselor to counseled relationship is awesome. Unmistakable, at certain parts, for the way Christ deals with our uncertainty, our rejection of His encouragement and our fatalist assumption of all things being lost, the King's counselor Lionel Lougue demands that he relate in unassuming, friendly terms that force royalty to humble themselves. The wonderful paradox of this movie is that Lionel's counsel to the King emphasizes humility and equal standing with all men, while reassuring King George's total qualification to rule a country, even a country at the brink of war.
So much like Jesus. To bring us down to bring us up. Jesus says in Mark 10:42-45
“You know that those who are recognized as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them; and their great men exercise authority over them. 43 But it is not this way among you, but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant; 44 and whoever wishes to be first among you shall be slave of all. 45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”
Perfectly capturing the ethic of Jesus, I say.
The Empire Strikes Back has one thing that keeps me comin back for more every time.
The revelation of Yoda as one of the most powerful Jedi's of all time.
He's green, he's short. He clearly has no lightsaber... he may not even have any known enemies. But by spending a little time with him, you know that he can take down armies. How?
With wisdom. With practiced strength that flows from a direct, unfiltered connection to his source of power. Luke is in an unmistakable phase of questing, fascination and discovery of his own powers. Little does he realize that these things, if unchecked, can turn into an obsession and rule his future as a Jedi, eventually turning him to the dark side with the promise of more power. Yoda's central theme is that his looks and approach break every perception that Luke has for what a Jedi should be and move Luke into a oneness a solidarity that align morals and action in a way that has him speaking life into his own father, DARTH VADER, in the next movie. Luke tells his own father, the resident master of the force in the galaxy, "Search your feelings father, there is good in you, I know it." And Luke's commitment to the truth about the dark side, the Jedi way, and refusing the power granted by moral sacrifice gives us a glimpse of the finished man that can come about when allowing Jesus to break our perceptions and show us a way that is so unpopular, it's actually totally unheard of.
There are more, much more lessons to be learned from these movies and other movies. Dutch is another good one. Blind Fury with Rutger Hauer, a great one. A blind vet takes on his best friend's kid to show him that the world isn't safe and that selfishness is the safest form of living there is, resulting in self-defeat. It goes on and on and on.
Then there's our story. Someone, much much greater than us has swooped in as if from nowhere. His words have challenged and tried us to the point of total confusion. His Spirit has kept us in the game by way of total attraction to His person. At the moment of our utter desperation and imminent failure, he has entered the situation uninvited and saved us, rendering the enemy powerless. We are Daniel-San, we are Charlie, we are Luke... only it's Jesus that comes and opens our eyes. We need rescue.
That's all for now. Check out this clip from Scent of a Woman.... we live in an unfair world, but we have a lawyer that argues our case.... PERFECTLY. In addition to that, He validates us as people, fully restores us, and contends for the person that is hidden beneath the fallen man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dH4p9BQ3V9o
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
I Just Want To Celebrate!
I was feeling really down when I woke up this morning. Sometimes the fact that I don't fit in as well as I'd like to at work, or in life, what have you, kind of gets me down. Then I prayed about it and I said, "My Dad will tell me what to do."
Like 40 seconds later I had that stupid "I..... just want to celebrate" stuck in my head by Rare Earth. Never really gave the song that much credit, it had always been a song I kind of overheard while I was at quick check or something. But this song was in my head until I couldn't take it anymore, so I got the Youtube song up, partnered with the lyrics, and look at what I found.
Thanks God! I'm celebrating right now!!!
I just want to celebrate another day of livin'
I just want to celebrate another day of life
I put my faith in the people
But the people let me down
So I turned the other way
And I carry on, anyhow
That's why I'm telling you
I just want to celebrate, yeah, yeah
I just want to celebrate, yeah, yeah
Another day of living,
I just want to celebrate another day of life
Had my hand on the dollar bill
And the dollar bill blew away
But the sun is shining down on me
And it's here to stay
That's why I'm telling you
I just want to celebrate, yeah, yeah
Another day of living, yeah
I just want to celebrate another day of living
I just want to celebrate another day of life
Don't let it all get you down,
Don't let it turn you around and around
And around and around
Well, I can't be bothered with sorrow
And I can't be bothered with hate, no, no
I'm using up my time by feeling fine, every day
That's why I'm telling you I just want to celebrate
Aw, yeah
I just want to celebrate yeah yeah
Another day of living, yeah yeah
I just want to celebrate another day of livin', yeah
I just want to celebrate another day of life
Don't let it all get you down, no, no
Don't let it turn you around and around,
And around and around, and around
Around round round
'round and around round round round
don't go 'round
Here's the youtube clip... please run this song through your speakers, buy from the itunes store... whatever... just blast it, it's great!!
Like 40 seconds later I had that stupid "I..... just want to celebrate" stuck in my head by Rare Earth. Never really gave the song that much credit, it had always been a song I kind of overheard while I was at quick check or something. But this song was in my head until I couldn't take it anymore, so I got the Youtube song up, partnered with the lyrics, and look at what I found.
Thanks God! I'm celebrating right now!!!
I just want to celebrate another day of livin'
I just want to celebrate another day of life
I put my faith in the people
But the people let me down
So I turned the other way
And I carry on, anyhow
That's why I'm telling you
I just want to celebrate, yeah, yeah
I just want to celebrate, yeah, yeah
Another day of living,
I just want to celebrate another day of life
Had my hand on the dollar bill
And the dollar bill blew away
But the sun is shining down on me
And it's here to stay
That's why I'm telling you
I just want to celebrate, yeah, yeah
Another day of living, yeah
I just want to celebrate another day of living
I just want to celebrate another day of life
Don't let it all get you down,
Don't let it turn you around and around
And around and around
Well, I can't be bothered with sorrow
And I can't be bothered with hate, no, no
I'm using up my time by feeling fine, every day
That's why I'm telling you I just want to celebrate
Aw, yeah
I just want to celebrate yeah yeah
Another day of living, yeah yeah
I just want to celebrate another day of livin', yeah
I just want to celebrate another day of life
Don't let it all get you down, no, no
Don't let it turn you around and around,
And around and around, and around
Around round round
'round and around round round round
don't go 'round
Here's the youtube clip... please run this song through your speakers, buy from the itunes store... whatever... just blast it, it's great!!
Friday, July 1, 2011
Multiple Logins To FB Within The Hour Means I'm Depressed
There is so much that I've been confronted with as I got home from Europe. I was thinking about posting some run through of my experience in Europe. I also wondered whether I should talk about the significance in the differences of faith practices of Europe and America. Or perhaps something about Taize. But none of that is pressing in importance, none of that is at the forefront.... only the misery of my situation. Only the unbearable burden that I've been called to carry, with no way out. The burden of being me.
You see, in the end depression only amounts to dissatisfaction with the self. I don't care if every psycologist in the world disagrees with me. I don't know anything about psychology either, but I know my condition. Something I've carried with me since a very young age.
This is one of those times; When God seems so distant its as though he's not even there. Where you feel like inside yourself, you could go the distance, you could take a trip to the edge, and the consequences could not matter less. When you wish that all the pain of living would just eclipse behind some large, emerging solution that you could see on the distance, marching toward you, to your aid like a hundred thousand soldiers all commissioned to just you.
There's nothing proferred my way that falls into any such description though. I only think about this issue with my church. How my world came crashing down in an instant. How I was crushed, subjected to ridicule, lied to, publicly disdained and then how I marched up to play the drums after the most disrespectful experience of my life, so I could be a nice guy. I've been thinking about other things too. I've been thinking about how there has been large inconsistencies in my employment history, only 1 and 1/2 years at best, of lasting with a given work place. Either I didn't want them, usually they didn't want me, and kept me on with a time limit. A few times I just left because I knew I'd end up leaving some other way too. The shit of it is that my resume had one 4-5 year commitment on it, standing apart as a beacon of consistency apart from all the other questionable employment histories, and that was my home church. It said; Faithfully serving there since 2007. Now that's gone.
Some people would say, "you should've left anyway. It's a toxic place, you're time was up.. blah blah blah..." To be honest they drop off those words without the full weight of the knowledge of going home afterwards and still being me. So I ask you, dear readers, what do I do to improve my condition? How can I change the very fiber of who I am? How can I be anyone, anything else? A whipping boy for these men in power. A slimy, squeezable, plush toy for sycophantic psychotic shadowy black hats who promise nothing and speak lies but suck power and life from people who love them.
What's even more, I knew all this about my church long ago. I wanted to leave... to leave quietly without making any waves, with no one getting hurt, no bridges getting burned. But God told me to stay, and that was the worst commitment ever, to deal with fake people, the lowest form of people I could conjure up in my obscure and bizarre imagination. I listened to God, but the reward was found in the listening, it didn't come after, which was punishment for a life lived transparently. To say what I feel. To hold integrity in my right hand. To never lie, or twist or spin the truth. To take the full weight and blow of the reality of me within me, and give that to others because it was all part of the package deal. To know me, means to know all of me. My thoughts, my heart, how I feel about you, what I like, what I don't like, and everything that I think about the world. When I thought this life style of honesty, openness and transparency was a virtue.. now I don't know if I could recommend it to anyone. All that's left is me.
Rostand's Cyrnao de Bergerac says it best:
Or, - [to be] double-faced and sly - Run with the hare, while hunting with the hounds;
And, oily-tongued, to win the oil of praise,
Flatter the great man to his very nose?
No, thank you! Steal soft from lap to lap,
- A little great man in a circle small,
Or navigate, with madrigals for sails,
Blown gently windward by old ladies' sighs?
No, thank you! Bribe kindly editors
To spread abroad my verses? No thank you!
Or try to be elected as the pope
Of tavern-councils held by imbeciles?
No, thank you! Toil to gain reputation
By one small sonnet, 'stead of making many?
No, thank you! Or flatter sorry bunglers?
Be terrorized by every prating paper?
Say ceaselessly, 'Oh, had I but the chance
Of a fair notice in the "Mercury"!'
Thank you, no! Grow pale, fear, calculate?
Prefer to make a visit to a rhyme?
Seek introductions, draw petitions up?
No, thank you! and no! and no again! But - sing?
Dream, laugh, go lightly, solitary, free,
With eyes that look straight forward - fearless voice!
...For 'yes' or 'no' show fight, or turn a rhyme!
- To work without one thought of gain or fame,
To realize that journey to the moon!
Never to pen a line that has not sprung
Straight from the heart within. Embracing then
Modesty, say to oneself, 'Good my friend,
Be thou content with flowers, - fruit, - nay, leaves,
But pluck them from no garden but thine own!'
And then, if glory come by chance your way,
To pay no tribute unto Caesar, none,
But keep the merit all your own! In short,
Disdaining tendrils of the parasite,
To be content, if neither oak nor elm -
Not to mount high, perchance, but mount alone!
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Judgment Day This Saturday, And What That Means For Your Weekend
In Matthew 24, perhaps Jesus' most well known eschatological passage (or passage concerning the end of days), we find an interesting verse in light of the coming prediction of the Earth's destruction scheduled for this Saturday.
Matthew 24:20
"But pray that your flight will not be in the winter, or on a Sabbath."
Sorry Jesus, turns out that our flight will be on the Sabbath.
Just a little joke, but I'd like to examine the entirety of this weekend's situation in how it relates to the church, and those outside the church. And while it may sound crazy, I'd like to examine the possibility of Mr. Camping's predictions for this weekend actually being true.
Jesus has promised to return to this world. (Matt. 24:30) He's promised that His return will undoubtedly be in the light of VERY uncomfortable times. Times marked by tribulation, floods, famine and war. All of which seem to be assembling now. It's hard to ignore. Our time has been bookmarked by a huge tsunami, followed by a mile wide tornado, being concluded by the Mississippi flooding at record-breaking levels. The middle-east is in mayhem (which is barely news, I'd honestly be more interested if Her Majesty's Royal Navy was involved in some struggle) but the presence of world violence is among us. If anything, this is a sample situation of the end times at best.
The most pressing question I have received over and over from friends, coworkers etc. has been whether I really believe that the end of the world will occur. They haven't asked about Harold Camping, they haven't asked about what my church believes, or inquired about scholarly positions on Mr. Camping, but they have mostly asked for my personal thoughts on the matter. They've asked what I'm convinced of. Most times, I have suspected a question beneath the question, which is probably something like this; "How much time do I have before I'm reckoned with the King of the Universe?"
At the very least, Harold Camping has stirred the general awareness of most everyone around me, that they are mortal, that they are certainly NOT the masters of their own fate, and that the possibility exists that all may not be right with God.
Allow me to break away from the feeling of anxiety creeping up your throat. I'd like to say that I'm most wary of the preachers and religious leaders who deliver a consistent and streamlined message of comfort. And I will say this unapologetically:
If you are not reconciled with God, through the person of Jesus Christ, by the faith in your heart testifying that He is Lord and God, then the last thing on this God-given earth I would like to give you is a message of comfort. I maintain, no matter how unpopular it makes me, that you should be very uncomfortable.
Why you ask?
Because all these few events have done -- the tsunami, floods, war, tornadoes and earthquakes-- all they have done is remind you of your mortality. And I will remind you of this; Were you less mortal before these events than you are right now? Do you understand what I mean?
There has been a few disasters that have ravaged this country, a prediction of a direct act of God pointed toward a sinful and evil mankind, and now, all of the sudden, death is knocking at our door as if we were fine and safe in our sheltered American lives before. I promise you, nothing has changed about your sinful condition, and your condition of judgment before God, besides what can be changed by His Son Jesus.
Think about how you would feel if you needed to face God on Saturday. How would your condition suit you? Would you be able to confidently say, I belong in Heaven, because my sins were forgiven, or would you be enslaved to the burdens of your own choice to serve yourself and man here in this earth, and then to be bound to do so in the afterlife.
We do not serve an angry God.
His wrath has been satisfied.
But what happened to that wrath that He had for sin at the cross?
It was scattered and made its abode among those who don't believe in Jesus.
John 3:36 says "He who believes in the Son has eternal life; but he who does not obey the Son will not see life, but the wrath of God abides on him."
I don't believe the Father sends people to hell. I believe people make firm and committed decisions to go there. I believe people become faced with the truth, but love their lives too much to even open a dialog with Jesus.
I know I may sound totally fire and brimstone, but this is a sincere plea to anyone who is wondering what their fate will be like the day Jesus comes back.
If you believe in justice, if you believe in any plausibility of an existing right or wrong, if you believe that God can do more than forgive you, but change your life, now is the time. Not tomorrow, because tomorrow is promised to NO ONE. That's not a scare tactic. It's a truth. And as a preacher, called by the Lord Himself, I am not called to only comfort, or only tell of wrath, but above all else I am committed to one thing and one thing only; the truth.
To conclude....
It may not be this Saturday. It may not be this summer. But one day we will all stand before God and give an account of our lives. Whether we were united to His life, by the death of His Son, or whether we were alien to Him, by our willingness to depart from Him in sin. Our first resort is to shut Him out of our lives and be the masters of our own ships. I would plea, in light of the ever-imminent truth of Jesus return; be made right to God.
Most importantly, be honest with yourself. If you know deep down inside that something wrong in your heart needs to be made right. Make it right. It's as easy as saying I'm sorry to an all forgiving God who is waiting to restore to you the life you were meant to live; a life determined by Him, not sin.
My message to the church is simply this. Why have we only considered the return of Jesus for this Saturday? Why have we ceased living in total anticipation of Jesus' return. As I talked with someone in the store today, he claimed that Jesus coming back would be inconvenient because he was getting married on Saturday.
Now I understand marriage may be the most anticipated event of someone's life, but a human marriage in all it's glory can in no way be realistically compared to the church's marriage ceremony with the Lamb.
Have we forgotten the glory that awaits us?
Have we feared men and chosen the easy path of Jesus' ambiguous return, holding off on it's message as a distant and immaterial future event, rather than counting on it the next day.
One thing Harold Camping has missed, is that Jesus imminent return shouldn't strike fear in to the hearts of believers as he trembles with the prospect of Jesus' return, but that it is to be, without question or doubt, the most glorious day of our existences. To see our King face to face. To see the fulfillments of promises made thousands of years ago.
To live in an eternal kingdom, where glory and beauty and rest abound. Where sin can not enter into, and where humans can dwell with God as they were meant to in the garden of Eden. To be in an environment, where it is not possible to cry, simply because no suffering or anxiety exists to cause it.
To live in the Kingdom of God, in its eternal splendor and to reign with God. To do what we were meant to do. And to see the tormentor of our souls defeated at last, never to disturb us again.
This is the gospel, the reason for the Bible, the reason for this blog and the reason for my life. No exceptions and no apologies.
Matthew 24:20
"But pray that your flight will not be in the winter, or on a Sabbath."
Sorry Jesus, turns out that our flight will be on the Sabbath.
Just a little joke, but I'd like to examine the entirety of this weekend's situation in how it relates to the church, and those outside the church. And while it may sound crazy, I'd like to examine the possibility of Mr. Camping's predictions for this weekend actually being true.
Jesus has promised to return to this world. (Matt. 24:30) He's promised that His return will undoubtedly be in the light of VERY uncomfortable times. Times marked by tribulation, floods, famine and war. All of which seem to be assembling now. It's hard to ignore. Our time has been bookmarked by a huge tsunami, followed by a mile wide tornado, being concluded by the Mississippi flooding at record-breaking levels. The middle-east is in mayhem (which is barely news, I'd honestly be more interested if Her Majesty's Royal Navy was involved in some struggle) but the presence of world violence is among us. If anything, this is a sample situation of the end times at best.
The most pressing question I have received over and over from friends, coworkers etc. has been whether I really believe that the end of the world will occur. They haven't asked about Harold Camping, they haven't asked about what my church believes, or inquired about scholarly positions on Mr. Camping, but they have mostly asked for my personal thoughts on the matter. They've asked what I'm convinced of. Most times, I have suspected a question beneath the question, which is probably something like this; "How much time do I have before I'm reckoned with the King of the Universe?"
At the very least, Harold Camping has stirred the general awareness of most everyone around me, that they are mortal, that they are certainly NOT the masters of their own fate, and that the possibility exists that all may not be right with God.
Allow me to break away from the feeling of anxiety creeping up your throat. I'd like to say that I'm most wary of the preachers and religious leaders who deliver a consistent and streamlined message of comfort. And I will say this unapologetically:
If you are not reconciled with God, through the person of Jesus Christ, by the faith in your heart testifying that He is Lord and God, then the last thing on this God-given earth I would like to give you is a message of comfort. I maintain, no matter how unpopular it makes me, that you should be very uncomfortable.
Why you ask?
Because all these few events have done -- the tsunami, floods, war, tornadoes and earthquakes-- all they have done is remind you of your mortality. And I will remind you of this; Were you less mortal before these events than you are right now? Do you understand what I mean?
There has been a few disasters that have ravaged this country, a prediction of a direct act of God pointed toward a sinful and evil mankind, and now, all of the sudden, death is knocking at our door as if we were fine and safe in our sheltered American lives before. I promise you, nothing has changed about your sinful condition, and your condition of judgment before God, besides what can be changed by His Son Jesus.
Think about how you would feel if you needed to face God on Saturday. How would your condition suit you? Would you be able to confidently say, I belong in Heaven, because my sins were forgiven, or would you be enslaved to the burdens of your own choice to serve yourself and man here in this earth, and then to be bound to do so in the afterlife.
We do not serve an angry God.
His wrath has been satisfied.
But what happened to that wrath that He had for sin at the cross?
It was scattered and made its abode among those who don't believe in Jesus.
John 3:36 says "He who believes in the Son has eternal life; but he who does not obey the Son will not see life, but the wrath of God abides on him."
I don't believe the Father sends people to hell. I believe people make firm and committed decisions to go there. I believe people become faced with the truth, but love their lives too much to even open a dialog with Jesus.
I know I may sound totally fire and brimstone, but this is a sincere plea to anyone who is wondering what their fate will be like the day Jesus comes back.
If you believe in justice, if you believe in any plausibility of an existing right or wrong, if you believe that God can do more than forgive you, but change your life, now is the time. Not tomorrow, because tomorrow is promised to NO ONE. That's not a scare tactic. It's a truth. And as a preacher, called by the Lord Himself, I am not called to only comfort, or only tell of wrath, but above all else I am committed to one thing and one thing only; the truth.
To conclude....
It may not be this Saturday. It may not be this summer. But one day we will all stand before God and give an account of our lives. Whether we were united to His life, by the death of His Son, or whether we were alien to Him, by our willingness to depart from Him in sin. Our first resort is to shut Him out of our lives and be the masters of our own ships. I would plea, in light of the ever-imminent truth of Jesus return; be made right to God.
Most importantly, be honest with yourself. If you know deep down inside that something wrong in your heart needs to be made right. Make it right. It's as easy as saying I'm sorry to an all forgiving God who is waiting to restore to you the life you were meant to live; a life determined by Him, not sin.
My message to the church is simply this. Why have we only considered the return of Jesus for this Saturday? Why have we ceased living in total anticipation of Jesus' return. As I talked with someone in the store today, he claimed that Jesus coming back would be inconvenient because he was getting married on Saturday.
Now I understand marriage may be the most anticipated event of someone's life, but a human marriage in all it's glory can in no way be realistically compared to the church's marriage ceremony with the Lamb.
Have we forgotten the glory that awaits us?
Have we feared men and chosen the easy path of Jesus' ambiguous return, holding off on it's message as a distant and immaterial future event, rather than counting on it the next day.
One thing Harold Camping has missed, is that Jesus imminent return shouldn't strike fear in to the hearts of believers as he trembles with the prospect of Jesus' return, but that it is to be, without question or doubt, the most glorious day of our existences. To see our King face to face. To see the fulfillments of promises made thousands of years ago.
To live in an eternal kingdom, where glory and beauty and rest abound. Where sin can not enter into, and where humans can dwell with God as they were meant to in the garden of Eden. To be in an environment, where it is not possible to cry, simply because no suffering or anxiety exists to cause it.
To live in the Kingdom of God, in its eternal splendor and to reign with God. To do what we were meant to do. And to see the tormentor of our souls defeated at last, never to disturb us again.
This is the gospel, the reason for the Bible, the reason for this blog and the reason for my life. No exceptions and no apologies.
Friday, April 29, 2011
The Death of David Wilkerson
This is truly a sad thing. To be frank, I don't know much about David Wilkerson. I do know about the impact of Times Square Church. I do know that Teen Challenge (a drug rehabilitation program also founded by Wilkerson) has changed thousands. I know fundamentally that he was a man of God who loved the spread of the gospel, and that we are together in an eternal family which shares my grief with his. He's also the voice behind a very moving video which is based on a sermon of his called 'A Call to Anguish'. It can be found here and it will make you cry http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5_QoVPisCI&feature=fvst
The point of this is to let you know that David Wilkerson's life had an impact in Manhattan and was wiped out, not by an accident, not by an unprecedented event that God didn't see coming, but because his time had been fulfilled. He was a righteous man. Watch that video and you will surely know, this Pastor loved our God.
This was written on David Wilkerson's blog the day before he died.
From the blog entitled "When All Means Fail."
The point of this is to let you know that David Wilkerson's life had an impact in Manhattan and was wiped out, not by an accident, not by an unprecedented event that God didn't see coming, but because his time had been fulfilled. He was a righteous man. Watch that video and you will surely know, this Pastor loved our God.
This was written on David Wilkerson's blog the day before he died.
From the blog entitled "When All Means Fail."
"To those going through the valley and shadow of death, hear this word: Weeping will last through some dark, awful nights, and in that darkness you will soon hear the Father whisper, "I am with you,'" Beloved, God has never failed to act but in goodness and love. When all means fail-his love prevails. Hold fast to your faith. Stand fast in his Word. There is no other hope in this world."
I find it nothing short of prophetic that in this man's last hours he had written about the goodness of God despite suffering and pain, and every bit of discomfort life can bring. I devote this blog to him, his life and his legacy and pray for the family that is grieving over their loss. Truly this was a man of God.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Excerpt From My Paper On Spontaneous Worship
Hey all,
Below is an excerpt from my paper on spontaneous worship, hopefully with more to come. So far its comin' out alright, but here are definitely some thoughts I'd like to share with you guys, and just some fun stuff concerning how blessed God is when His people take pleasure in Him.. enjoy!
"An emerging pattern of musical worship is being appropriately termed “spontaneous worship” because of the spontaneous elements that make it what it is. While favored by the more charismatic movements, all denominations in God’s kingdom are susceptible to this manifestation in the musical worship of God. If someone playing the piano as the only instrument involved in their worship, in the most traditional church in America repeats the chorus or refrain of a song in an unexpected manner, they have just participated in spontaneous worship. Usually encouraged by God’s Holy Spirit, this style of worship is becoming more widespread as the practice of musical worship has become more accessible to the lay person. Mostly anyone with the available talent of singing and strumming a guitar simultaneously can perform the act of musical worship, which has led to more common instruments (not ordinarily considered for the standard of “sacred music”) to become involved as well. Guitars, harmonicas, acoustic basses, djembes, bongos, pennywhistles, xylophones and in one rare case a didgeridoo have all been, in my personal experience, vehicles used by God to bless God and lead His people into His presence and a spirit of worship."
Below is an excerpt from my paper on spontaneous worship, hopefully with more to come. So far its comin' out alright, but here are definitely some thoughts I'd like to share with you guys, and just some fun stuff concerning how blessed God is when His people take pleasure in Him.. enjoy!
"An emerging pattern of musical worship is being appropriately termed “spontaneous worship” because of the spontaneous elements that make it what it is. While favored by the more charismatic movements, all denominations in God’s kingdom are susceptible to this manifestation in the musical worship of God. If someone playing the piano as the only instrument involved in their worship, in the most traditional church in America repeats the chorus or refrain of a song in an unexpected manner, they have just participated in spontaneous worship. Usually encouraged by God’s Holy Spirit, this style of worship is becoming more widespread as the practice of musical worship has become more accessible to the lay person. Mostly anyone with the available talent of singing and strumming a guitar simultaneously can perform the act of musical worship, which has led to more common instruments (not ordinarily considered for the standard of “sacred music”) to become involved as well. Guitars, harmonicas, acoustic basses, djembes, bongos, pennywhistles, xylophones and in one rare case a didgeridoo have all been, in my personal experience, vehicles used by God to bless God and lead His people into His presence and a spirit of worship."
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
I Love Suffering
Suffering. Being at the end of yourself. Being on the edge of your tears. Being full of emotion and humanity, the inner tearing away of all the makes you impure and which extracts the raw, ballistic, unapologetic you.
In the Christian faith we call it the refiner's fire.
The Valley of the Shadow of Death.
We call it a thorn in our flesh.
Agony.
I love suffering.
I love suffering not because I'm a sadist. Not because the luxuries of life have bored me so I fulfill out of my need an existential necessity of struggle, but no.... I love the desperation and the striving and the adventure and the answer of suffering.
Can you remember the last time a scenario of your life was so difficult it made you sweat?
In Luke 22, Jesus sweat so profusely, not from a physical work out or from torture or any sort of physiological exertion, but from anticipation.
Boy there sure isn't enough of that these days.
He wasn't being tormented, he wasn't being hurt or burned, but his sweat came from a knowledge of what was to come.
I find that fascinating.
I also love suffering because it connects us with all that is in our humanity.
People in ordinary life, in the normal stride of the day dealing with a normal set of problems will place themselves on top of their worlds, I suspect, because they are actually so insecure that a pretense can only serve up a dose of painkillers to their emotional insides. When we're connected to the truth there's something so special about that and this is what I mean in specifics:
We are human beings.
Without all the answers.
With great big tears from great big hearts.
We are vastly connected to other people.
We are extravagantly dependent on others whether we accept it and realize it or not.
We are beings that yearn for something better.
To be honest there is so much more to this, and so much more we receive from suffering that I could list little sentiments like that all night, but I'd like to keep it brief.
Suffering not only exposes the person that we rigorously tuck away on the inside but deals with that person to shape and transform the core of who we are and we leave our moments in life that we call suffering, changed.
And who doesn't want change?
Oh, I guarantee someone could read this and say, "I actually don't want change. Things are alright, or at least I could see something better, but I've been through a lot and would like to rest here a while. Change isn't for right now."
I promise you it is.
You must change.
The world tells you you're alright. You're not alright. You're imperfect, you've got flaws and not only that, you're scared of them in places so deep if you found them exactly you'd be lost in yourself.
Stop. Don't turn off this blog, this is for you.
You've got to change.
And not because you're bad and God hates you.
Because part of your beautiful story includes a God that picks you up after you fall,
a good, caring and loving God
Who loves you so much.
That He won't mind.
Bringing you to your desperation.
To your anxiety.
To your exhaustion.
To the pain you carry, all for the purpose of taking it away. Draining it from you, like a bad blood disease.
You see, suffering doesn't stand alone. It's not just suffering and then nothing.
It's suffering and then -- something new in God.
Bigger, stronger, more flame/element resistant faith.
Things in Christ you always wanted like a bigger heart.
More compassion.
Gifts.
A knowledge of who you really are and what's really important.
This is the fellowship of Christ's sufferings, being conformed, even to His death.
Yes, I love Christ and I indeed love suffering. His suffering.
Which is my comfort.
2 Cor. 1
In the Christian faith we call it the refiner's fire.
The Valley of the Shadow of Death.
We call it a thorn in our flesh.
Agony.
I love suffering.
I love suffering not because I'm a sadist. Not because the luxuries of life have bored me so I fulfill out of my need an existential necessity of struggle, but no.... I love the desperation and the striving and the adventure and the answer of suffering.
Can you remember the last time a scenario of your life was so difficult it made you sweat?
In Luke 22, Jesus sweat so profusely, not from a physical work out or from torture or any sort of physiological exertion, but from anticipation.
Boy there sure isn't enough of that these days.
He wasn't being tormented, he wasn't being hurt or burned, but his sweat came from a knowledge of what was to come.
I find that fascinating.
I also love suffering because it connects us with all that is in our humanity.
People in ordinary life, in the normal stride of the day dealing with a normal set of problems will place themselves on top of their worlds, I suspect, because they are actually so insecure that a pretense can only serve up a dose of painkillers to their emotional insides. When we're connected to the truth there's something so special about that and this is what I mean in specifics:
We are human beings.
Without all the answers.
With great big tears from great big hearts.
We are vastly connected to other people.
We are extravagantly dependent on others whether we accept it and realize it or not.
We are beings that yearn for something better.
To be honest there is so much more to this, and so much more we receive from suffering that I could list little sentiments like that all night, but I'd like to keep it brief.
Suffering not only exposes the person that we rigorously tuck away on the inside but deals with that person to shape and transform the core of who we are and we leave our moments in life that we call suffering, changed.
And who doesn't want change?
Oh, I guarantee someone could read this and say, "I actually don't want change. Things are alright, or at least I could see something better, but I've been through a lot and would like to rest here a while. Change isn't for right now."
I promise you it is.
You must change.
The world tells you you're alright. You're not alright. You're imperfect, you've got flaws and not only that, you're scared of them in places so deep if you found them exactly you'd be lost in yourself.
Stop. Don't turn off this blog, this is for you.
You've got to change.
And not because you're bad and God hates you.
Because part of your beautiful story includes a God that picks you up after you fall,
a good, caring and loving God
Who loves you so much.
That He won't mind.
Bringing you to your desperation.
To your anxiety.
To your exhaustion.
To the pain you carry, all for the purpose of taking it away. Draining it from you, like a bad blood disease.
You see, suffering doesn't stand alone. It's not just suffering and then nothing.
It's suffering and then -- something new in God.
Bigger, stronger, more flame/element resistant faith.
Things in Christ you always wanted like a bigger heart.
More compassion.
Gifts.
A knowledge of who you really are and what's really important.
This is the fellowship of Christ's sufferings, being conformed, even to His death.
Yes, I love Christ and I indeed love suffering. His suffering.
Which is my comfort.
2 Cor. 1
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Passion, Intellectualism, Detraction
I find it funny how the human mind works... things I mention often such as the need to comprehend things. (Comprehension is a form of control and well... blah blah blah we don't need to go on to all that but I could if I wanted to.) The human mind does feel a need to understand the non-understandable though. I don't think things present themselves as non-understandable and people out of sheer audacity and pride try to do it anyway out of a need to prove something (although that is the case sometimes), but certain things, and most notably the ideas of God, present themselves as uniquely "self-evident" and our humanity cries out and rocks our awareness with a need to capture, to assimilate the framework, to eat the whole thing. To understand or learn it.
Keep in mind.... our sinful minds (interestingly enough) do not cry out for a need to KNOW something that is non-understandable, mystifying or amazing. Knowing something is different from understanding it. I know my father. His name is Nelson Mir, born in Queens, NY ca. 1955 and raised in Cuba until the age of 5. I could recite the rest of his life story, but the more time I spend with the guy, the more I realize in my deepest parts of understanding that I do not understand him. I understand a little bit. I certainly know my father. But I don't understand the ENTIRE THING, and this is the singular frustration of man's relationship with God, we know Him but we don't understand HIS FULLNESS. My question is initially this: If we cannot fully understand another man, (or as in my illustration, the closest of people to us) how can we attempt to understand God, who as the Bible says authored knowledge. That, my friends, is absurdity. And our frustrations become poignantly inflamed when God acts outside of our framework (this is usually a result of asking God to do such a thing in prayer.) Suffice to say this, if I were to say that I could perfectly understand any human around me, it would be absolutely insulting, so we cannot and must not engage those attempts with God.
Now that I've set the stage, this is what I really want to talk about. Our initial interaction with God comes in full, raw experience that satisfies the mind (the conceptual) and our hearts (the emotional). We get it; we know what we need to know and we truly know it... an abundance of information and profundity surrounds us at every turn. Our minds are alive with the life of God empowering them to understand, Him and Himself in all things. Our fear of the Lord begins our path to understanding! (Prov. 9:10)
Our emotion.. whoa.. our emotion has never been so scintillated. Our minds and hearts course with pleasure, love, joy, happiness, longing and mostly all these things come through at the same time! It is an explosion. Meeting the true and living God through faith in Christ is awesomely similar to a first kiss with someone you love... where the consummation of longing, loving, intrigue, passion, and sharing are exercised in symbolic action that is perfectly representative of your mutual feeling.
Now with all that mush said and done, I hope I've left no room for intellectualism.
Intellectualism and emotionalism are two highly active functions of the mind, but I feel it is important to know that they are not mutually exclusive. Perhaps this is the mistake we have made in our compartmentalizing western culture. Is there a marriage of the two? Do the two compliment each other or are they pitted against each other? I will say that the former example listed previously is a result of the Spirit and the latter is the flesh.
I have found that there is a place for emotionalism in my life and it is not to be discredited. As a matter of fact, the book I'm reading right now, Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Peter Scazzero argues that emotions are extraordinarily important and should not be discredited, lest we suffocate our humanity or our soul. Emotions are important, thank God we have them as they are a gift and God help us when they take us to dark places. I can't explore the deep topic of emotions now, but there is a world of truth and lies that we experience through our emotions.
The intellect is a tool, given to us by God to be more than just reactional, visceral beings. (Psalm 32:9) Emotions join together with and inform the intellect so that we can process and experience life. Now here's the problem; The various traditions of Christian faith found throughout most of the world have sided with either emotionalism that ridicules people who only operate only on a rigid method of understanding while mistakenly throwing out their soul as well, or rigid intellectualism who view the more emotional trends of faith as having discarded the very truth of God itself, looking only to experience to validate their views. But where does real faith and following Jesus fall? These two depictions of following Jesus do not do justice to what God intended our walk with His Son actually meant do they? Of course not.
Following Jesus is what it is without being confined to one of these descriptions or the other. Our mind's eventual conformity to the mind of Christ is a cooperation, and total, uncheated engagement with the fullness of our emotions and the pleasures and benefits of rational thought. We are allowed to go crazy in passion for God, even to the point of making fools out of ourselves and being subject to public ridicule. Jesus is ok with that =). We are allowed to discuss the greatest and highest being in the loftiest terms, without sacrificing our integrity or pretending to be anyone but ourselves, and Jesus is ok with that. We can sing, dance, pray in tongues, fall, cry and scream in joy, pleasure, repentance and suffering, and we can elaborate, meditate, postulate, extrapolate and explore the riches of His wonder, while knowing that He is completely beyond comprehension! And by the way, being beyond comprehension is not a bad thing, it is a great thing for this reason; When I say God is unable to be fully comprehended the operative word is fully!! This means that we have a full life, of exploring and finding out and knowing more about GOD!!! And never being bored, or watching a rerun in the Spirit, but that every day, up until and including the day we die, we will dive deeper and deeper into the heart of God, and Jesus, through the Holy Spirit. It will never end.
And when we meet Him face to face, a new pleasure arises. A great unveiling of new mysteries.
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